1 - 2 = -1

I've been feeling frustrated at myself. I know it's partly because we're not on a schedule, and I don't do well without schedules. I also feel frustrated because I just spent a great deal of time cleaning my kitchen (still more to do) and dining area, and then my washer breaks down. So not only do I have to buy parts to fix it, I had to pull my washer and my dryer out of the closet, meaning I can't use either one, and my kitchen/dining area is one big mess. Do you know what a weeks worth of accumulated laundry looks like? I feel like everything is one step forward, two steps back.

There's so much to be done in the yard, but with EFY going on this week, Joe and Kelly are gone all day. Then to top it off, Joe has a hike on Saturday so he'll be gone all day. I just want my home and yard to be in order, and I feel like unless I do everything myself, it just won't get done. When I look outside, I feel depressed. When I look around at all the projects that are unfinished, or not even started yet, I feel depressed. I'm frustrated about money, too...it seems like every time I think I've got the situation under control, another repair comes up (like the dryer).

My replacement iPod hasn't been working properly, and I called yesterday, wasting over an hour on my cell phone (because my home line isn't working) for them to tell me what I already knew...that the problem is with the iPod, not my computer. An HSA account that used to have no fees suddenly developed fees without warning and for months has been chewing into my balance without me knowing it.

I'm annoyed with Kelly, who in the past five days has accused me of being a goody-goody two shoes, told me I'm unreasonable, that my plans are stupid, and has flat out refused to do everything I've asked her to do. There's more, but I'm trying to restrain myself. I'm frustrated with the bathroom scale, which is all I'm going to say about that topic. I want to go to the temple and can't seem to find a way to get there except cleaning on Fridays. I'm annoyed with someone who for two days in a row has said they're on their way and then hasn't shown up for hours afterward. I hate my haircut.

I guess you could say I'm in a really negative mood of late. Thank goodness the missionaries came yesterday. Their hard work in the garden area made it look lovely and gave me a little hope. And thank goodness for my home teacher who helped me move the washer and dryer and take it apart. Today I have an all-day seminar learning about Alzheimer's disease management techniques, which I was really looking forward to until my dryer broke down. Oh well, I guess I can only do what I can do.