 |
| Borrowed from the LDS.org Website © 2006, Mark Gudmundsen. |
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Sunday, August 25, 2013
Therapy
Two days of therapy following my miserable week yielded this beautiful sight:
It's what I do when I feel like everything is out of control...take a task that I can actually finish and get to it.
And just in case you think this was a small feat, let me assure you...it produced 30 pounds of recycling, 22 pounds of trash, and another five pounds of paper that needs to be shredded. Most of it was paper that had to individually examined and decided upon.
It was therapy on two fronts...restoring my sense of control, and severing ties to painful things in my past. I still have to work on the filing cabinets, which I'll tackle this week. In the meantime, the kids are fighting over who gets to use my desk first. :)
And yes, this is the same room which has the (now) lovely closet!
It's what I do when I feel like everything is out of control...take a task that I can actually finish and get to it.
And just in case you think this was a small feat, let me assure you...it produced 30 pounds of recycling, 22 pounds of trash, and another five pounds of paper that needs to be shredded. Most of it was paper that had to individually examined and decided upon.
It was therapy on two fronts...restoring my sense of control, and severing ties to painful things in my past. I still have to work on the filing cabinets, which I'll tackle this week. In the meantime, the kids are fighting over who gets to use my desk first. :)
And yes, this is the same room which has the (now) lovely closet!
Tuesday, August 20, 2013
College Life
Kelly started at Fresno City College on the 12th. I'm very excited for her new adventure, because I know that college life is very different from high school. In this picture, she's getting ready to go to work at the bridal salon where she does inventory and other responsibilities. As you can see, the cell phone is still an incredibly important part of academic life. :) I forgot to mention that her mode of transportation is either city bus or boyfriend.
Monday, August 19, 2013
First Day of School
And we're off! The 2013 school year began this Monday. Joe is a junior at Bullard High. Laine just began her freshman year at Bullard High, and Johnny is a seventh grader at Tenaya. All three children are driving themselves back and forth to school on their bikes. For Laine and Joe, it's not too bad...just a mile and a half each way. For Johnny, though, it's a 2.5 mile one way trip, and he has to travel on a busy street for a portion of the way. It makes me very anxious, but it's a necessary thing. They need to be able to be more independent since I'm working days and can't pick any of them up.
They're all looking forward to a busy and productive school year, and I'm looking forward to a little less damage to the house while I'm gone all day. :)
Saturday, August 17, 2013
After Photos
Thanks to the able assistance of Christin and Heather, we were able to slay the monsters in my closet and restore order.
I couldn't bring myself to post any before photos, because, well...it was ugly.
There were boxes and boxes of papers that needed to be shredded. There were games and school supplies on the floor. There was laundry. Lots of things that shouldn't have been in my closet somehow came to consume my closet.Look at it now!
We were only able to accomplish this work of art because Heather and Christin were patient and determined and spent a few hours with me while I sorted through things that they drug out of the closet. The hardest part was all the paper...items that each needed an individual decision about what to do with them. (And I still have a ton more paperwork to sort through on my desk! I'm doing that 15 minutes each day until it is done.)I can now access my workout equipment, my craft supplies, the school supplies and all of my stamping collection.
I love it. I keep going in there and getting startled by how nice it is. I feel like I could live in my closet now!!
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
Monsters in the Closet
There are monsters in my closet. They are spilling out of boxes. They are falling off of shelves and hangers. They are lying on the floor. Life is full of messes, and my closet is one big mess.
That's going to change.
Two of my friends are coming over and helping me to tame the beasts. After that, no children allowed in my closet without my knowledge and permission. (Can you hear the "Yeah, right!" from your house?)
(sigh)
In a way, the closet (and my desk area) are reflective of my life at the moment...crammed so full, you almost can't fit anything else in. Indicative of a crazy schedule, too little sleep and the feeling of being completely overwhelmed. Full of things that need to be drug out into the light, dealt with and decided upon. Purging, trashing and donating in massive quantities are the order of the day, in all areas of my life.
Let it begin!
That's going to change.
Two of my friends are coming over and helping me to tame the beasts. After that, no children allowed in my closet without my knowledge and permission. (Can you hear the "Yeah, right!" from your house?)
(sigh)
In a way, the closet (and my desk area) are reflective of my life at the moment...crammed so full, you almost can't fit anything else in. Indicative of a crazy schedule, too little sleep and the feeling of being completely overwhelmed. Full of things that need to be drug out into the light, dealt with and decided upon. Purging, trashing and donating in massive quantities are the order of the day, in all areas of my life.
Let it begin!
Thursday, August 8, 2013
Called to Love
We have a few residents who will be passing away soon, and I've been thinking about what this calling means, to serve the elderly. Of course, in my many years of working with seniors, I've experienced a lot of loss. Some people ask me how I can stand to work with an age group that is so close to death. They ask, "Have you gotten used to it? Does it get easier?"
My answer is complicated. No surprise, right? Nothing is ever as straightforward as it seems. I fall in love with most of our elderly clients. A few just plain sweep me off of my feet. I feel called to love and serve these people with all of my heart, and it's easy for me to do just that. For as long as they are with me, whether that is days or weeks or months or years, I will do my very best to love them and meet their needs. It feels natural and is clearly a part of who I am as a person.
Of course, in my mind always is the knowledge that death is imminent for all of them. Well, really for all of us, right? But for our seniors, it seems closer and more real to most of the world. Truthfully, it never gets any easier to see families and individuals go through the pain and sorrow of physical death and saying their earthly goodbyes. My heart aches for them. I miss people when they die. (I still can't do my morning announcements or lead my exercise class without thinking of one of the most wonderful ladies I have ever met.)
Fortunately, though, I am blessed to know that all of this here on earth is part of God's plan for us. His plan of happiness contains a lot of sorrows, and earthly death is part of that sorrow. The sorrows and pains of this world are here as a result of this mortal sphere, and are tools God uses to refine us and make us better than we ever believed we could be. He created this world and placed us here to exercise our agency, to learn and to grow. Every part of this plan from his perspective is to "bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man." In other words, to overcome sin and death so that all of us - his children - may live with him again in glory. If I look at death as a doorway (in the same way that birth is a doorway), and if I truly know who waits on the other side of that door, then death loses some of its sting and I can rejoice spiritually in the crossing of a soul, even as my mortal mind and heart mourn at the loss of these new (old) friends.
I think it's a bit like foster-parenting. I have the privilege of loving and caring for these individuals who may or may not have a support system. I provide physical, emotional, social and spiritual care while they are entrusted to me. Most of them like me or love me, and some of them tolerate me. I know going in to the deal that it's for a short time. Some of the people (many, in fact) have health issues that make caring for them a challenge at times, but under all of that is a person, with the richness and the layers of life clinging to them.
When death comes, it is an occasion with many attributes. Sorrow for the family and for myself. Relief for the individual who no longer suffers pain. Joy for the soul gone on to reunite with family and with God and our Savior. Knowledge that death is a doorway through which our physical bodies cannot fit. Excitement that this person I love gets to know and experience the truthfulness of the gospel of Jesus Christ. Confidence that every person will be resurrected and receive a perfected and glorified physical form. Peace that permeates my soul and lifts me as I go about the business of loving and caring for the next senior entrusted to my care.
For some, home is a place with walls and a roof where their family lives. For me, home is serving others. It is the place I feel most useful, most like myself, most like the person my Father in Heaven wants me to be, and it is the place where I am prepared to enter my Heavenly home. This place of serving my elderly friends, this place of transition and joy and sorrow...this is my home. No, it's not easy to say goodbye, and no, death doesn't get any easier. In fact, there are days when it seems more than I can bear. But then God through his Holy Spirit reminds me and cradles me, and I feel at peace. This is my calling...a calling of love. And with God, all things are possible.
My answer is complicated. No surprise, right? Nothing is ever as straightforward as it seems. I fall in love with most of our elderly clients. A few just plain sweep me off of my feet. I feel called to love and serve these people with all of my heart, and it's easy for me to do just that. For as long as they are with me, whether that is days or weeks or months or years, I will do my very best to love them and meet their needs. It feels natural and is clearly a part of who I am as a person.
Of course, in my mind always is the knowledge that death is imminent for all of them. Well, really for all of us, right? But for our seniors, it seems closer and more real to most of the world. Truthfully, it never gets any easier to see families and individuals go through the pain and sorrow of physical death and saying their earthly goodbyes. My heart aches for them. I miss people when they die. (I still can't do my morning announcements or lead my exercise class without thinking of one of the most wonderful ladies I have ever met.)
Fortunately, though, I am blessed to know that all of this here on earth is part of God's plan for us. His plan of happiness contains a lot of sorrows, and earthly death is part of that sorrow. The sorrows and pains of this world are here as a result of this mortal sphere, and are tools God uses to refine us and make us better than we ever believed we could be. He created this world and placed us here to exercise our agency, to learn and to grow. Every part of this plan from his perspective is to "bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man." In other words, to overcome sin and death so that all of us - his children - may live with him again in glory. If I look at death as a doorway (in the same way that birth is a doorway), and if I truly know who waits on the other side of that door, then death loses some of its sting and I can rejoice spiritually in the crossing of a soul, even as my mortal mind and heart mourn at the loss of these new (old) friends.
I think it's a bit like foster-parenting. I have the privilege of loving and caring for these individuals who may or may not have a support system. I provide physical, emotional, social and spiritual care while they are entrusted to me. Most of them like me or love me, and some of them tolerate me. I know going in to the deal that it's for a short time. Some of the people (many, in fact) have health issues that make caring for them a challenge at times, but under all of that is a person, with the richness and the layers of life clinging to them.
When death comes, it is an occasion with many attributes. Sorrow for the family and for myself. Relief for the individual who no longer suffers pain. Joy for the soul gone on to reunite with family and with God and our Savior. Knowledge that death is a doorway through which our physical bodies cannot fit. Excitement that this person I love gets to know and experience the truthfulness of the gospel of Jesus Christ. Confidence that every person will be resurrected and receive a perfected and glorified physical form. Peace that permeates my soul and lifts me as I go about the business of loving and caring for the next senior entrusted to my care.
For some, home is a place with walls and a roof where their family lives. For me, home is serving others. It is the place I feel most useful, most like myself, most like the person my Father in Heaven wants me to be, and it is the place where I am prepared to enter my Heavenly home. This place of serving my elderly friends, this place of transition and joy and sorrow...this is my home. No, it's not easy to say goodbye, and no, death doesn't get any easier. In fact, there are days when it seems more than I can bear. But then God through his Holy Spirit reminds me and cradles me, and I feel at peace. This is my calling...a calling of love. And with God, all things are possible.
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
Welcome back! Goodbye!
This afternoon Joseph and Laine returned from youth conference in Cambria. They apparently had a good time, if sun kissed faces are any indication. According to Joe, the dance at the beach was awesome, and he spent the whole time dancing. No surprise there! He also apparently danced with his younger sister, which I find to be really sweet.
This was Laine's first youth conference and she also had a great time. She was fairly happy and excited, and she enjoyed the dance, too.
My poor kids...I dragged them to Sacramento last Thursday evening. We returned late on Sunday evening. Joe and Laine packed up and went to Cambria early Monday morning and returned this afternoon, and this evening, I will be bringing them back to their dad's house where they will be getting on a train in the morning and heading to Sacramento again. It's been non-stop traveling for Laine and Joe!
Kelly didn't go to youth conference this year. She thinks she's too old, and of course, she doesn't want to miss any possible moment she can spend with her boyfriend. She won't be going back to Sacramento either, because she's stressing out about college starting next week and she feels overwhelmed. Fortunately, after 11 straight days of working, I will have Friday off and I am going to help her get things in order so she can be more at peace.
Life is full and busy here! Now if only I can get my laundry and kitchen under control!! Which I have absolutely NO desire to do. (sigh) Maybe after I drop the kids off at their dad's house...
This was Laine's first youth conference and she also had a great time. She was fairly happy and excited, and she enjoyed the dance, too.
My poor kids...I dragged them to Sacramento last Thursday evening. We returned late on Sunday evening. Joe and Laine packed up and went to Cambria early Monday morning and returned this afternoon, and this evening, I will be bringing them back to their dad's house where they will be getting on a train in the morning and heading to Sacramento again. It's been non-stop traveling for Laine and Joe!
Kelly didn't go to youth conference this year. She thinks she's too old, and of course, she doesn't want to miss any possible moment she can spend with her boyfriend. She won't be going back to Sacramento either, because she's stressing out about college starting next week and she feels overwhelmed. Fortunately, after 11 straight days of working, I will have Friday off and I am going to help her get things in order so she can be more at peace.
Life is full and busy here! Now if only I can get my laundry and kitchen under control!! Which I have absolutely NO desire to do. (sigh) Maybe after I drop the kids off at their dad's house...
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
Entrenched
One of the things I love about working with the elderly - have always loved about working with the elderly - is the glimpse into the hearts of families and individuals that it can offer.
When a family member seeks me out to share a story, ask for insight, or just to hear some reassurance, I am reminded of the hearts that are bound together through sorrow, joy and the tedium of life. And sometimes, I am granted the privilege of more than just a glimpse. I observe with a full heart the tenderness of a man with Alzheimer's who cannot remember much but surely remembers his wife as he gently takes her fussing, careworn fingers in his hand to kiss and caress and then hold her hand in his. I can't help but smile at a daughter who comes faithfully throughout the week as she tends to her father, and finishes her visits by looking him squarely in the face, telling him how much she loves him and showering his head with kisses.
I witness families gathering, celebrating the 98th, the 100th, the 101st birthdays of their loved ones, and taking joy in making memories together. I have been deeply privileged to serve families as they sit by the bedside of their loved ones as they prepare to depart this world. I am bound to these families in a deep and profound way.
And then there are those individuals who have little or no family to support them. Throughout my time working with seniors, these are the ones my heart can't resist. Yes, even the cranky, crotchety ones. I find joy and meaning in helping even those who are difficult to love.
At times like these, I feel my calling to work with, serve and love families and seniors as a tangible and valuable part of my role on earth. These moments exemplify the commandment to love one another, and they touch me deeply.
I am so grateful for the richness my life has been blessed with. I may not be wealthy in terms of money, but my bounty is overflowing with the blessings of service, and I am most grateful for it!
When a family member seeks me out to share a story, ask for insight, or just to hear some reassurance, I am reminded of the hearts that are bound together through sorrow, joy and the tedium of life. And sometimes, I am granted the privilege of more than just a glimpse. I observe with a full heart the tenderness of a man with Alzheimer's who cannot remember much but surely remembers his wife as he gently takes her fussing, careworn fingers in his hand to kiss and caress and then hold her hand in his. I can't help but smile at a daughter who comes faithfully throughout the week as she tends to her father, and finishes her visits by looking him squarely in the face, telling him how much she loves him and showering his head with kisses.
I witness families gathering, celebrating the 98th, the 100th, the 101st birthdays of their loved ones, and taking joy in making memories together. I have been deeply privileged to serve families as they sit by the bedside of their loved ones as they prepare to depart this world. I am bound to these families in a deep and profound way.
And then there are those individuals who have little or no family to support them. Throughout my time working with seniors, these are the ones my heart can't resist. Yes, even the cranky, crotchety ones. I find joy and meaning in helping even those who are difficult to love.
At times like these, I feel my calling to work with, serve and love families and seniors as a tangible and valuable part of my role on earth. These moments exemplify the commandment to love one another, and they touch me deeply.
I am so grateful for the richness my life has been blessed with. I may not be wealthy in terms of money, but my bounty is overflowing with the blessings of service, and I am most grateful for it!
Sunday, August 4, 2013
Educational Opportunities Abound
This week on Thursday, the kids and I packed up the car and drove to Sacramento. Actually, Kelly drove the whole way there (and back!) as part of her driver's education. She did a great job. The one incident that happened wasn't really her fault...there was part of a tire in our lane and she had no choice but to run over it. It beat up the guard under the front bumper and now I have a big plastic-y thing hanging down and dragging when I drive. If she had tried to avoid it, we would have had an accident, so she did the right thing.
I was signed up to take a class for my work to get certified as an activity leader. It was a three day course, beginning on Friday and continuing through Saturday and Sunday. While I enjoyed the class, I had forgotten how much I hate sitting still until I was forced to do it for three days straight. Ugh! And this was the first time for many, many years that I didn't get to go to church. I was very sad to miss sacrament, but Nick asked his bishop if he and Joe could administer the sacrament to me at home after my class, and he gave his approval. So right there, in Nick and Erin's little apartment, they blessed the sacrament, and my son Johnny passed it to me. I couldn't help shedding a few tears of happiness at this wonderful bit of grace!
I learned a lot of little details about being an activity director that will help me tremendously in my job, and I walked away with about 25 ideas from others about projects that can be done as part of our activity program. Some of them are great, some are near duplicates of what we already do, and others are mediocre. Nevertheless, any planning I don't have to do is welcome!!
I also signed up for two classes at Fresno City College...art classes! Since one of the types of therapy I am interested in doing is art therapy, I wanted to take some classes to help me along. I'm very excited! The classes will meet four nights a week, and even though I really want to take the classes, I'm already having anxiety about things like interrupting my temple schedule and how much gas it will take to get there. So we'll see if I stick it out!
I was signed up to take a class for my work to get certified as an activity leader. It was a three day course, beginning on Friday and continuing through Saturday and Sunday. While I enjoyed the class, I had forgotten how much I hate sitting still until I was forced to do it for three days straight. Ugh! And this was the first time for many, many years that I didn't get to go to church. I was very sad to miss sacrament, but Nick asked his bishop if he and Joe could administer the sacrament to me at home after my class, and he gave his approval. So right there, in Nick and Erin's little apartment, they blessed the sacrament, and my son Johnny passed it to me. I couldn't help shedding a few tears of happiness at this wonderful bit of grace!
I learned a lot of little details about being an activity director that will help me tremendously in my job, and I walked away with about 25 ideas from others about projects that can be done as part of our activity program. Some of them are great, some are near duplicates of what we already do, and others are mediocre. Nevertheless, any planning I don't have to do is welcome!!
I also signed up for two classes at Fresno City College...art classes! Since one of the types of therapy I am interested in doing is art therapy, I wanted to take some classes to help me along. I'm very excited! The classes will meet four nights a week, and even though I really want to take the classes, I'm already having anxiety about things like interrupting my temple schedule and how much gas it will take to get there. So we'll see if I stick it out!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)