Christmas Photo

I can't afford to send out all the Christmas cards I'd like to send. So many people in my life to love! And this year, with my uncle dying so close to Christmas, we will be doing some unexpected traveling so this photo will just let others know that all those smiles are because of all the love we feel from all of our family and friends. We can't tell you just how much your friendship and love has meant to us every day! We wish you the merriest of Christmases, with peace and joy deep in your soul as you contemplate the Greatest Gift: Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, who died and lives for us! Because of him, we can be clean from all our sins if we repent, and because of him, we can forgive others and ourselves. I love my Savior...I feel surrounded by his love. I'm grateful for all of my wonderful family and friends who bless my life each and every day!

My Heart is Sad.

I received word from my mother this morning that my Uncle Norman has passed away. He lived in a group home in Moreno Valley, where he's lived since my grandfather had to be put into an assisted living facility. In the photo above, he's the one sitting at the table. (Also in the picture, left to right, Richard and Molly Vermette (my uncle and his wife) and my Mom and Dad.)

It's odd that we received the call today...I was thinking about him all through this morning, about visiting him during the kids' break from school. I recalled how hard it was to talk to him on the phone since he didn't have a hearing aid, and felt that I should call my Mom to make the arrangements to visit him. I also thought about how one day, his body would be renewed and he would be free of all the impairments he was burdened with in this life and that I couldn't wait to see what he would be like in the afterlife. Then, an hour later, I received a call from my Mom, telling me that he had passed away.

Norman Vermette would have been 70 on January 26th. He never held a job due to physical and mental disabilities that began at his difficult birth (according to the doctor, he was oxygen deprived), though he was a hard worker in all that he tried to do. I grew up visiting him and my grandparents twice a week or more. He lived in 29 Palms most of his life. He often annoyed us as kids...he acted like a kid (teasing, tattling, being mean) but had an adult's body and we were expected to treat him like an adult. He had the largest collection of comic books I had ever seen, which he would let us read from time to time. He was an usher at the Catholic church we attended, and performed his duties faithfully every Sunday. He loved to watch television. He hated changes in his routine or that of anyone around him. He liked things in order and would often "spy" on us as kids to make sure things were in order. We all got used to him following us around. He was the first to call with any news, bad or good. He could whistle tunes like no one I've ever met. He doted on his mother and loved to buy her little trinkets. My funnest memory of him was when he would put us on the trailer in back of his little yard tractor and give us a ride. I also remember him driving a little go-cart around my grandparents' five acre desert home. I remember he had a pet monkey ages ago when I was very young, and he loved that monkey a ton.

He was always affectionate to me and to my children. He loved to watch the kids, and delighted in trying to figure out which relative they reminded him of as children. He had a nice smile and a funny laugh and would rub his hands together in delight when he told or heard a funny joke. Those same hands would writhe together when he was upset or anxious. He was very opinionated, and the anxiety he suffered from increasingly affected his relationships with people as he got older. He was valiant in doing the best he knew how to help his Mom and his Dad as their health deteriorated. His greatest accomplishment in my opinion was that he helped all of us learn to be less judgmental and more Christ-like in our love for others, both by being difficult (at times) to love and by being a truly loving human being. He believed in God and did everything he was capable of as well as he could. I loved him, and he will be missed by his five siblings and the members of our families.

Please, mom? No!

I just heard on the news that McDonald's is being sued for targeting ads to children, circumventing the parents and causing the children to whine and beg for McDonalds. And of course, those helpless parents just have to give in since their children are having a fit about wanting that happy meal. What the heck?? When I was a kid, every toy under the sun, every sugary cereal ever invented, every cool theme park in the world advertised on television. If I asked for something I saw on a commercial, my parents used this handy answer, with or without explanation, and I learned over time that it meant exactly what it said. Ready? Here it comes...NO!

In fact, this answer made such an impact on me when I was a child that I used it on my own children. I never once experienced a temper tantrum at the register over something my child wanted that I wouldn't buy, because any temper tantrum was either ignored or the child was immediately isolated without an audience. I never once was "forced" to buy my kids a happy meal or any other junk food item. If I purchased something for my children, it was because I wanted to. For the record, I can count on one hand the number of times that we have eaten at McDonald's since my children were born. Have we eaten at fast food restaurants? Yes. Do we do it regularly? No.

I taught my children from a young age that we eat food that's good for us, and have food that's not good for us as an occasional treat. When my children wanted a hamburger, I made one at home out of the boca burgers I had in my freezer. I prepared food that tasted good and had a variety of fruits and veggies. Now when they eat at fast food restaurants, they can tell the difference both in quality and in how the food makes them feel afterward.

Parents need to be parents and consumer groups etc. need to stop laying the responsibility for raising our children on everyone except the parents. Discipline, responsibility and accountability should be taught to our children by the parents, who should also possess those qualities themselves. Sheesh...what is this world coming to?

Rubbing out the Grinch!

This is Laine's new dresser. It's been sitting in my house for a few weeks, waiting for me to get around to staining it. I think today will be the day. I am feeling frustrated and upset by several things in my life, and they have made me struggle to keep a positive attitude. I'm feeling grinchy and grouchy and grumpy. This is entirely unjustified...the few difficulties I have in my life are FAR outweighed by my many blessings and I need to start acting like it, so I'm going to direct all this negative energy into something productive and beautiful. And if that's not enough, then we're going to move all the girl's furniture into the living room and rip out carpet and paint and lay hardwood flooring. Or maybe I'll move all my pantry items into the livingroom and lay tile in the breezeway. Or both! Regardless, I think I have enough to rub out the Grinch!

My Favorite Bear

"If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together, there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we're apart, I'll always be with you.”  --Winnie the Pooh


I always loved Winnie the Pooh when I was a child. His gentle nature and humble way of looking at the world struck something deep inside then, but I never really thought about it until recently. I think I'm looking for my Winnie the Pooh. Have you seen him?

Nick, Joe & Johnny

Just wanted to share this cute photo of the boys...Nick (Erin's husband), Joseph and Johnny, taken in early November.

Serving Up Soup

Today I had the great opportunity to serve lunch at the Poverello House. I spent some time in the kitchen cutting up pasilla peppers first, then served lunch, first to the volunteers/workers, then to the hungry people standing in line outside. I had an interesting group of volunteers to work with...a local motorcycle club came out, dressed in their leathers with their wives and children. Though their appearance was rough and their language colorful, it was a real pleasure to see their hearts were in the right place as they sought to make sure that each client received the best possible experience. I also worked with one gentleman who volunteers every Friday, and a young ladies' service group from a local church. There was so much help, in fact, that instead of the food being served cafeteria style, which is what I'm used to, we served all the clients at their seats, restaurant style.

Today's menu: Yummy-smelling turkey soup, canned diced peaches, salad, a roll, and a slice of pie. As the clients came in, they picked up a sack lunch for their evening meal, since today was treated like a weekend day. We served 340 lunches. I know that's only a fraction of the cold and hungry that could use nourishment. The director said that about 1200-1400 meals are served for breakfast, lunch and dinner every day. They provide the food for Naomi's House as well. I also know that the Fresno Rescue Mission serves meals each day.

I love having the chance to do something really practical and beneficial for the homeless and hungry members of our communities. Something in my heart just breaks when I hear the security workers say they are letting the families in first, and I see mothers, fathers and children come in, or when I see elderly adults being escorted by middle aged adults. By far, most people who come in are "singles," meaning they are eating alone.  There's chatter in the dining room, and some people who are there obviously like one another, and some don't. Every ethnic group is there. They sit, they eat, they talk (and some sing!), and they get up and leave, carrying their little white bags full of nourishment for later. Some have seconds, most do not.

Today when we were done, a tall, lively African-American gentleman graced us with a song, beautifully sung to thank us for our help. The clients thank us too, with a "thanks" or a "God Bless." I looked around me today and saw brothers and sisters, children of my Father in Heaven, and realized again how much I take the plenty on my table and the blessing of a home for granted.

As I left today, I looked at this complex of tents, small sheds, the Poverello House and Naomi's House, and think, there but for the grace of God go I.

Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving! Gobble, gobble! I am on my own this Thanksgiving...the kids are enjoying the day with their dad in honor of his birthday and thanksgiving. I plan on being grateful for everything today and keeping a happy heart. I will be spending part of my day with my home teacher's family to partake of the traditional turkey, and part of the day I will spend visiting with some seniors at a local senior center. And tomorrow, I'm lucky enough to be able to spend serving at the Poverello House.

I wanted to take this opportunity to say that I am really grateful for this life that I have. I've always wanted a simple life...to be a wife and mom, to raise a few animals, to have people in my life to love, a few good close friends. I have all but one of those! How fortunate I am! I look around me and I'm humbled by the ways that God blesses me.

I live in the most blessed country on earth, and that because of the brave men and women who were and are willing to die to keep us free. I live in a state I love (though not politically, I must say). I live in a diverse and bountiful part of that state. I am grateful for my freedom.

Our pets are well-loved and affectionate. Our chickens have been a real blessing, not only in providing the best eggs we've ever had, but also in providing diversion, amusement, and teaching opportunites. Birds visit our yard regularly. We have beautiful trees around us, and live in a quiet, well-established neighborhood with great neighbors. Our house, though pretty old (built 1949) and in much need of attention, is secure and warm, and the monthly bill is low.

Though I lost everything I spent years building because of the circumstances of the divorce, the income from the sale has sustained our family through difficult times and will continue to do so for a few months yet. I waste no time being bitter over these things...instead, I put my life and those of my children in the loving hands of my Father in Heaven. I trust him to guide me and help me through all the uncertainties ahead.

I am so thankful to my Savior, Jesus Christ. I am so grateful for my faith, which I know is a gift from God. I know that He loves me and grants me every good thing. I know that he wants me to be happy, but that his ultimate goal is my eternal JOY, and so I submit my will to his, knowing that he knows what chastening, what opportunities, and what growth I need to become all that he would have me be.

I am grateful that I've had good health. With the exception of a few minor health issues, like the arthritis in my hands, feet and shoulder, I am blessed to be a very healthy person. I'm also grateful for the health of my children. I am fortunate to have good health insurance for the kids.

I could go on ad infinitum with all the things I am grateful for. I am most grateful for my children and the people I love in my life. They give me reasons to keep moving forward, and their love keeps me sane. Hugs to all of you!!

My Grandfather: Isidore Arthur Vermette

This is a photo of my Grandmother, Agnes and my Grandfather, Isidore. I never called them that, though...to me they were always Memere and Pepere.

Pepere never finished school, but I still think he was a genius. He could fix nearly anything, make nearly anything. Some of my fondest memories were watching him work with wood and make lovely things for my grandmother. I also enjoyed watching him weld, though I was not allowed to get too close during that process to protect my eyes.

He made one room houses into large homes. He fixed vehicles and altered them when necessary. He made at least one mobile home that I know of. When I was young, he made me a dollhouse and a nightstand, both of which I loved immensely. He couldn't sit still to save his life.

He was a prankster to the extreme and loved to "get" people. He was also a fantastic storyteller with a great sense of humor. He read Reader's Digest faithfully (and left it on the back of the toilet along with Guideposts so the rest of us could enjoy it, too!). He was lovable, but also fiercely tempered. I learned early on not to make him mad or break any rules around him. He was one of the hardest workers I knew. He could swear in two languages. He always knew how to do everything, and felt free to tell you how to do it.

He was a Catholic, and attended church every Sunday he could. His favorite hymn was "How Great Thou Art" and I loved to hear him sing it.

He and my grandmother raised six children...four girls, and two boys. Their names are Jeannette, Rita, Gloria (my mom), Richard, Norman and Susan. His biggest fights were with my Uncle Norman, their disabled son who lived with them their whole lives. Both were stubborn as mules.

When they were older, Pepere loved to watch HSN with my grandmother and buy her little trinkets. When my grandmother was at the end of her life, he cared for her the best he knew how, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

He was imperfect and riddled with faults and failings, and blessed with many talents. I love him with all my heart.

(Those cabinets behind my grandfather were built by him.) He died April 4, 2006, 4 years after his sweetheart died. He was 89 years old.

Cranking Up the Heat and the Gratitude

I had to turn the temp on my hot water heater up this week. It's amazing how all spring and summer, I don't even think about it. We have all the hot water we can handle, thanks to our solar hot water heater. My gas bill runs about $4 a month during the summer. When the foggy days start to hit, though, my once warm water starts to feel cold, and I have to crank up the hot water heater.

I have been really blessed by having the solar water heater. It has worked flawlessly for the thirteen and a half years that I have lived in this home. It was here when I got here, and hopefully I have many, many more years of nearly free hot water ahead of me.

My gas bill isn't the only thing that goes up in the winter. The solar panels on the roof that produce huge amounts of electricity during the sunny months slow down considerably during the winter, and my electric bill creeps up. Or in some cases, leaps up! I would prefer to supplement our heat with the EPA certified wood-burning insert we installed when we found out Kelly had asthma, but the new regulations on wood burning make it hard to use the insert as a reliable heat source.

I am very blessed to have these money (and environment) saving devices in my home. They've literally saved me thousands of dollars over the years. I overlook them most of the time. I'm thankful for all the ways the Lord has blessed me. This is just one more example of his tender mercies at work in my life.